Hail the Conquering Hero

Hail the Conquering Hero

Ass kicked. That is what I feel after 16 plus years of parenting first one and now a full household of 7 children. Tired, confused, humbled, rewarded....but mainly I have just had my ass kicked. And not in that inspirational way you get after working with a personal trainer for an hour. 

Now before I get accused of being a Grumpy Gail (made that one up), let's be perfectly clear here. 16 plus years. 7 kids.

I don't think I have slept through the night since Beck was born. I know I haven't showered or closed the bathroom door to use the toilet without at least one of them needing something that could not possibly wait another second. Please please can you put in the password to the Internet while you pee mom!!! There is no way Minecraft will still be there if you don't! 

Multitasking is a 24 hour a day requirement and without fail things slip like water through the cracks. Often they are no big deal, but there have been some doozies. There was that one time we forgot Keegan was on a date and locked him out of the house and went to bed (and turned our phones on silent), whoops. He ended up sleeping on the couch at his girlfriend's house and at 6:30 the next morning I showed up there tail between my legs with a box full of donuts. I have received the occasional phone call about field trip slips and missing reading logs. And sometimes semi-important school events are not really in my top ten things to remember at 6 AM. See below.  (Cooper's homemade wresting t-shirt with the words Southern Bell Ringer boldly written in marker that somehow became the look of choice for Picture Day! And yes, that would be fake blood.)

I have taken to using disinfectant wipes to clean my entire house...each and every surface! I forget to pack lunches or I pack lunches with things that are clearly not lunch food, sometimes clean underwear are misplaced at the bottom of the dirty laundry basket (weird), and dinners this week have included chicken nuggets, (they were organic, ) corndog nuggets (they weren't)and endless bags of frozen broccoli.... because it really does go with everything.

I would be lying if I said I never wondered (in the voice of Job Bluth) if I had made a Huge Mistake...Having such a large brood, I mean, who does that nowadays? 
That would be me and all my kids above.^

The one thing I have always done as a parent is be present. Sometimes they didn't want me present and they have let me know (I can be embarrassing, shrug). Sometimes I have been resentful of having to always be present and they could tell and that has made me feel a real schmuck. There were even times when being present brought a lot of heartache and grief. Being present really does wear you down, it is so easy to lose sight of why you do what you do as a parent. Eye on the prize as it goes, but what if you can't see the damn trophy!

This is what I have learned so far.

I love the saying "you made the bed now you must lie in it".  I think it has been turned into an idiom that describes accepting that you must suffer the consequences of a past mistake.

Wrong. I think it means I have groomed and polished, paid attention to detail and used a gentle hand in anticipation that it will pay off and I will get to enjoy it later.
I made the bed (and had my ass kicked in the process) and I will get the benefit of enjoying and observing all the things these kids will have to offer the world. Honestly, my job doesn't ever seem to get any easier, but every day it becomes more clear. So keep it coming life, I can take the hits.
(sings) All Hail the Conquering Hero.